An algorithm for a better tomorrow

Has the world grown weary enough of algorithms? Last year, we discussed how Netflix apparently heard me talking about a plane crash and suggested I watch Manifest.

I'm a leader, not follower. Having said that, I have now watched the first three seasons of the show, and I feel like my television is getting a better handle on my preferences. As a hip, young millennial, look at these timely suggestions ripped from current pop culture trends:

"Perhaps an episode of Perfect Strangers would soothe Scaia's jangled nerves," the algorithm surmised. "He needs to relax, but since he's been watching a show about a plane crash, maybe we don't recommend the one where Jennifer and Mary Anne get sick on a flight, so Cousin Larry and Balki have to step in as flight attendants... with hilarious results."

"Or maybe he'd like to revisit The Critic since there's been talk of a reboot and also so we can show him he's slowly turning into Jon Lovitz," the algorithm continued.

A separate algorithm felt I should know our favorite crotchety TV dads really weren't that old.

Because of all these memes just scattered all over the place, those kids today are more connected than ever but also more miserable than ever.

To combat this, MySpace may reenter our lives. They're proposing an algorithm-free experience where we young people can simply work ourselves into a tizzy fretting about how to advance into someone's Top Eight.

Maybe it's not the algorithm's fault, though. The computer machine picks out TV shows from my youth I might enjoy revisiting. Kids might feel better if they could just settle down with stalwarts from ABC's iconic TGIF lineup.

I've also discussed with associates how we long for another part of our youth which may have involved 2 am stops at Taco Bell. Tragically, we learned the MexiMelt had been discontinued in 2019.

The algorithm helped us live our best lives, though, alerting me with an ad Taco Bell was bringing back the MexiMelt for one day only to get us to stop talking about the lettuce.

"There's never been anything close to lettuce in a MexiMelt," Taco Bell explained.

So I enjoyed one... even though I had dinner plans an hour later. Second Dinner was great, too, though, with associates and I checking out the new Spider-Man film.

They might have considered bringing back Tobey Maguire to fill out the early aughts nostalgia, though, because Spider-Man, MexiMelts and MySpace are the calming influences we need right now to guide us through this time when we all seem fraught with fear and anger. They can introduce the next generation to a simpler world where people still treated each other right.

You know what else is algorithm-free? Life, kids. For more tips on how to live, follow me on AOL Instant Messenger at "Balki S".